Monday, October 10, 2005

Cry baby

So, I've been sick (with a cold) since LAST Saturday. Yep, that's about 10 days. Kinda normal for me. Because my immune system is so weak, when I get sick, I GET SICK for a while. But now, today, I'm beat. I cried myself to sleep last night. I tried to not take any of my pain pills yesterday morning. I wanted to see how far I could go with out them and how much pain I still have. BAD IDEA. I was so sore by midday I just had to take them. I'm so tired of hearing, oh this will take time to heal Mel! My goodness, it's been since March 29th. I know my body takes a little longer than others to heal but I just want to know what comes next. If I continue to have pain like this (chronic pain) how do I deal with it? When do I get my life back? Do I get to go back to work?

I have a horrible headache today and of course in my mind that means I must have a tumor that the doctors missed...Or the pain in the back of my neck when I cough, must be meningitas. I start to panic and then think the wellbutrin isn't working right. Then I feel like throwing all of these damn pills down the toilet. I'm tired of them. I wanna be normal again.


I wonder why some people go through some things and why some have to hurt more than others and I honestly can't come up with an answer. I just know that there is a reason for it all whether or not we can see it at the time. That has to be it, right? You're going to survive, I do know that because you're one of the strong ones Mel. you don't know it, but you are. I could tell you to keep the faith, but I don't have your pain, physical or mental. But I do know that these things lead us or prepare us for something. I guess it's our purpose. I'm not a psychic. I just know you touch people without realizing that you do.
Please talk to you doctor about Discontinuation Syndrome, which is not really known by a lot of professionals.

Discontinuation Syndrome is a cluster of symptoms caused by the sudden stopping of meds, like Wellbutrin, and is experienced by up to 25% of people who stop taking meds without a gradual reduction.

I also had a patient who had flu like symptoms just like you. It was related to the Wellbutrin and its side effects. We changed her meds and she is doing very well now.

So, I guess I am saying to please investigate this further on all levels before you decide what your next step will be. And don't lose hope. :)

Wellbutrin side effects: sore throat, chills, fatigue, fever, flu-like symptoms, muscle rigidity.

I am sorry to hear of this! I am praying that you get well very soon! (Gentle) hugs to you! ;)

I hope your feeling better today..I'm just getting over a cold myself and I'm not a very good patient.

Very interesting what Deb mentioned..Please take her advice.

hugs to u.
take care of yourself. and it sounds like Dr. Deb has some good advice.
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